People are always asking me how I’ve been so successful as a coach.
They don’t understand how I was able to replace my income and leave my 10+ year career in the Insurance Industry and be able to come home to my family and work from home, setting my own hours, creating my own destiny as a full-time Beachbody Coach.
They don’t understand how I was able to build a business and solid team, while working full-time and maintaining my roles as wife and mother of 3.
They hope that I have some secret A-Z formula that is an easy to follow set of instructions for them to follow to duplicate the same success.
Here’s the secret: there is NO secret.
I will share with you some tips that will provide insight on how you can personally:
1) DEVELOP YOUR OWN BRAND
2) CREATE A GOOD REPUTATION
3) CREATE YOUR OWN INDIVIDUAL TRADEMARK
4) BE DEEMED AS A REPUTABLE COACH
5) SET YOURSELF APART FROM OTHERS
6) DIG DEEP INTO YOUR OWN PYSCHE
When teaching others and helping them achieve their goals, somehow in the process you will experience an ah-ha moment. This is that glorious moment when that light bulb goes off. This is that moment where you discover something about yourself that you’d never realized or recognized. These moments can be both shocking and rather victorious. These moments can edify you. It will provide proof of all your hard work or may be a self discovery like how I identified a gift I knew I possessed, which instantly increased my self worth and helped me justify my existence. These moments remind you that you have improved yourself from who you were yesterday. They remind you of the progress you’ve made. Focusing on these discoveries truly enrich your life. So, PAUSE and take the time to sit back and reflect and celebrate your growth. You deserve it. This is a key to insuring a better future. This is how you create a newer, better version of yourself, which will attract a new type of people, which will be open up a brand new door in your life. Sometimes, people panic at the thought of having to face their inner demons, let alone address the issues and fix themselves. It’s hard work. It takes inner strength. But remaining the same person they were a decade ago, still miserable and longing for a higher quality life seems like the least attractive option? They key to achieving extraordinary things is by doing what the average person will not. Are you going to live the rest of your life blending in with the crowd – the majority (98%) of the people, living a life of mediocrity with little to no feeling of satisfaction, fulfillment or enjoyment in life? Or will you be part of the 2% who says “I want something better! I deserve something better. I will work to find a way and do whatever it takes. I will NEVER give up. I know that it will NOT be easy, but I know for damn sure it WILL be worth it. I will take responsibility for my own destiny, not waiting for someone else to point the way, hold my hand or push me along. This is my life. I am ready to start living NOW because I know even though it is not for the faint of heart, anyone can do it. Where there’s a will, there’s a way!”
Remember, the last thing you want to do is blend in, be average or swim with the crowd! You want to be remembered and unique. So whatever the crowd is doing. Do the opposite.
If you don’t like where you are at. Stop wasting your time & energy complaining. Stop waiting for miracles. Stop Praying. You are in control of your own destiny!
I want to share with you this picture and the long-winded post that it was accompanied with. (Yes! Another one!) that I posted on my Facebook.
Please bear with me, so I can explain the relevance of the above picture to this “Hord-Lesson”.
This is just glimpse into my brain. (Scary, right?!?!?!)
Are you prepared to gain some insight on how I think. (Disclaimer: No refunds offered on A.D.D. roller coaster)
My mind and actions are propelled 100% by my heart.
Given my hearts track record, this was pretty risky business.
The first step was to forgive and trust myself. This was necessary, if I was expecting others to put their trust and blind faith in me.
I’ve taken time to ask myself why I felt that I have been a successful coach? The answer is because, it is on my mind 24 hours a day. (I even dream about it.)
This is not a hobby. This is not just an interest. This is not just something I fall back on to fill periods of boredom. This is not something I pursue only when I stand to gain a profit. This is not something I abandon or put on the back burner when I encounter chaos or stress in my life. This is not something I view as a burden or inconvenience. This is not something I view as “just a job”. This is something that I have embraced with my heart, body and soul. I eat, sleep and breath it. The passion is immediately recognized when I am speak of it. I meditate everyday how it has enriched my life. I am constantly trying to show others that this is within their reach as well. I believe that this was my second chance to get it right. I believe in and devote loyalty 110% to Beachbody because they provided me a second chance in life. It’s helped me face and move past so many things that held me back from being who I was born to be, finding my purpose, finding somewhere I belonged, enjoying life and most of all LIVING. I finally feel like my life is finally worth living. To me, it’s like I discovered a cure for Cancer and I want to tell everyone. I want to pay it forward because they deserve to have the same opportunity available. I want to save their life, instead of being greedy and keeping this amazing discovery all to myself!
EVERYTHING that I do, everything that I observe, everything that I face, I try to find a way to use it to teach others. No matter how small a detail, routine, or insignificant I think it may be, I ask myself:
– Is there a lesson to be taught?
– Will the principle improve my life now or can it be used for reference at a later date?
– Can I use what I learned to help someone I care about?
– How can I use this to get others to interact with me so I can get to know them better, so that they can get to know ME better and so that we can start building a trusting friendship?
Now remember, when building new relationships, it’s a two way street. You want to get to know more about them. Which means you will need to take TIME to get more than just the generic stuff like their name, age, marital status, size of family. If you are in this because you truly want to help others and make a difference, than you will truly desire to be their friend because you know what the benefits of true friendship are. A TRUE, GENUINE friend TAKES THE TIME to get to know what their interests are, things about their childhood and past, what their lifestyle is like now, what roles they are responsible for everyday, and is always respectful of the things they do not share the same opinion on. You will know what their deep-seated, specific goals are (not a superficial I want to lose some weight and be happy) and want them to reach them. A true friend will help them to visualize how they will feel emotionally when they reach them and how it will change their life and will believe they can achieve it. A true friend remembers important events/dates that have occurred or is coming up. When building new friendships remember this is NOT an interview. You do not want to inundate them with a ton of personal questions. You will take time to get to know them, looking for nothing in return, but constantly trying to add value to their life. You will want to remember the things they say. It’s one thing to hear, but someone will remember if you actually listened. Think back to your relationship with YOUR best friend. It evolved over time, not over a day of chatting on Facebook or thru one phone call. So be patient with people because not everyone wants to share and bare all. And the last thing someone wants to do is feel interrogated or like they are on trial.
– How can I reach others with this subject? Can I make them laugh and brighten their day?
– How can I tie this to something that I have recently learned that people in my audience are currently struggling with? Can this be used as a practical lesson to help them find a solution that they have not been able to find on their own?
– How can I give them hope thru an everyday, real life scenario that is RELATABLE so that they value my opinion, trust me, believe that I want them to succeed and truly care?
– How do I use this as something to set me apart from the other 140,000 coaches within Team Beachbody so that I am REMEMBERED and STAND OUT?
– How can I use this as a way to make my presence in their life relieve some of their burden and add value to their life?
Remember you cannot and will not be able to appeal to everyone out there without sacrificing part of who you are. Never compromise your integrity to gain a customer or get someone to like you. You MUST acknowledge, prepare and accept the fact that NOT everyone will think you are great, agree with your or ever express their appreciation. You must remind yourself DAILY that this is NOT something to take personal. This is NOT about you. Are you here to win a popularity contest? I’d hope not. You have to remind yourself that YOUR story, your gift, and contribution to society may be grandiose, but it may not have an earth-shattering effect on every single person that hears it. That does NOT mean you are not important or that your gift doesn’t matter or that you are not inspirational. It just simply means that, that person does not need YOUR gift at that CURRENT time in their life. Things change. Situations change. Situations change people. So, one day, some day, you may be able to connect and help someone that a year ago you couldn’t. Are you really going to let one persons opinion derail you or hold you back from sharing with others?
I do not try to win over everyone because I know that not everyone shares the same opinions, interests or goals and everyone struggles with their own personal demons. So clearly, not everyone will like my style of speech, dress, the way I conduct business, or even the way I talk or walk. Will I try to change who I am or change my opinion to become more appealing? NO way. I will continue to be me, living my life, fueled by my passion and desire to help others with what I am equipped to give. I will share snippets from MY LIFE, sharing my own interests, hobbies, past-times, opinions, past AND present failures & struggles, stories about my family, my goals, providing windows into who I AM. By doing so, I will connect with others. I be able to identify who my targeted audience is, which are people who share similar common goals, pasts or current lifestyle that I easily form a bond with.
For myself, the types of people that I find I connect with the easiest are hard working parents of multiple children, people who feel alone in life, people who have suffered from abuse, people who have strained or non-existent relationships with their family, people who feel lost in life and haven’t been able to find their purpose in life and feel that they have no direction at the current moment, people who have/had financial issues and are tired of always struggling, people who have low self-esteem, people who have never worked out in their life, people who are “fixers” and “pleasers”, people who have a hard time seeing their self-worth, people who have felt like a failure their whole life, people who compare themselves to others, people who are good at making excuses, people who people who have never accomplished anything that society deems as successful, people who are quick to judge and live in fear that others are judging them, people who are bitter and negative, people who have never set goals/dreams and have just settled for the life they are unhappily living, people with A.D.D. & people who have a hard time seeing the finish line and visualizing that they are capable of succeeding.
So after all that, I am sure you are thinking “That makes sense, but how does in the world can a post on Facebook about picture of that pair of shoes on your small asian feet (Random fact: they haven’t grown since I was 12!) convey any or all of that?” You have been probably thinking how is she going to turn this into a lesson or a way to attract a new customer. Watch as I pull a rabbit out of this hat!
Okay, so to get to the good stuff. (About time, right?)
Please take note of the following facets of my 1 post.
(ha, ha. Fooled you. You are learning patience, huh? Good, that’s the point. You need to SLOW down!):
#1 It is not related at all to my coaching business or the products or services I have to offer.
In no what does it scream: “BEACHBODY! BEACHBODY! DRINK SHAKEOLOGY! BUY A CHALLENGE PACK! MAKE ME YOUR FREE COACH! BE A COACH. LOOK AT MY NEWEST SELFIE! WHY HAVEN’T YOU SIGNED UP ALREADY!?”
#2 It provides education on a subject that I hear people discussing often: how to select the proper shoe to be using during workouts that won’t make their feet hurt. (I think there is as many people wearing the wrong type of shoe as there is women wearing the incorrect bra size!)
#3 It provides a solution to sore, tired feet and painful workouts. People like to be relieved of pain.
#4 It provides tips on goal setting (Something a lot of people are taught in elementary school, but due to being subjected to so many adults who have endured failure after failure, they project this on the next generation, totally discouraging this action because it is viewed as a source of discouragement and another avenue to fail.)
#5 It provides tips of finances (Tips that can be suggested to help others save up for the challenge pack. I am sure everyone has those that keep asking you about the challenge pack they’ve been wanting, every few months, hoping that you will tell them a different, lower price than the last 10 times they asked. But when they find out the price is still the same, the conversation always ends the same with, “I don’t have the money. I just can’t afford it now!” You are left feeling like you want to scream, especially when you see them check in at Starbucks the next day. You begin to doubt your capabilities and become even more discouraged when you see other coaches, on your team, signing a new coach every week. SNAP out of it! It’s NOT you. Stop using your energy to compare yourself to someone else. Quit using your energy to convince yourself you’re a failure. You’ve come this far, keep moving forward! Eyes straight ahead. Focus on helping these find a solution to their lack of funds for their challenge pack, which may in turn teach them why they financial problems and help them put an end to living paycheck to paycheck, blaming the economy and other things and taking responsibility for what THEY spend! And then remind yourself, that you are not that other coach. Your audience may be different. That coach may spend more time working on the business. The coaches they’re signing may have been people they’ve been working with for over a year. They may be inviting and sharing with twice as many coaches as you 7 days a week, instead of M-F like you. Focus on yourself. If you are not reaching your goals you set, expect more out of yourself, increase the time you spend, focus on creating more new relationships and inviting and better yet, be humble and reach out to that other coach and ask them for help or tips. Don’t use others successes to separate you from them. Don’t allow yourself to believe that your are not capable of achieving the same accomplishments achieved at the pace set by you, based on what your current lifestyle allows for. Don’t distance yourself from successful people. Instead find out how to get closer so you can be learn from them, be filled with positivity that will create your desire and belief that you will be better than average. Limit your time with those who don’t support your or don’t believe in themselves enough to believe that YOU can do it or are so unforgiving of their own failures that they do not know how to show how proud of you they are)
#6 Provides a center stage to share something about themselves. (They will tell you what shoe they are wearing and what they recommend. People like to be able to feel like they are contributing. They like to be right. They want to hear what others are saying because they are afraid of going against the grain or making a mistake so they collect data on a subject matter to make the “right” decision based on the majority of the popular vote.) People like to talk about themselves.
#7 Provides a outlet for strangers to interact and connect with other people and get to know one another. This is a safe topic that they feel they can discuss publicly and they feel less guarded because after all I am their mutual friend, so their stranger-danger-alarm isn’t on high alert. Then they will be curious as to what else they may have in common with this other person who they always see commenting on my posts.
#8 It reiterates Team Beachbody’s theme for 2014: Never give up (Which by the way, I have tattooed down my right side). Reiterating, reinforcing and reminding myself and my team this important task, not just for 2014 but for LIFE.
#9 It shows proof that I do what I say I do. I workout (do P90X3) and am committed to Beachody (was at Super Saturday) This is EXTREMELY important. People need to know you are in it for the long haul. Going to Beachody events are extremely vital to show to others that you are legit. Also, going to these events help not only show your commitment, but also you are the FIRST to know information and that creates more value because people will be more likely to come to you with their questions because they value your opinion and figure you’d be the one to know!
#10 It helps people learn how to solve problems (therefore never give up!) My motto is: where there’s a will there’s a way. (It’s tattooed on Ryan and I’s left wrists!)
My parents always taught me that no was no. If someone said “No.” you accepted it, That was life…. You didn’t question it. If someone didn’t like you or caused you problems, you turned the other cheek and walked away.
I remember asking for things as a child and being told “No.We can’t afford it.” And that was FINAL. My mom prided herself on being frugal which was admirable, but there was no regular rewards. Expensive items were not allowed. It was for irresponsible, selfish, materialistic people who were never satisfied. It was for people who knew nothing about finances. You sacrifice and “make-do”. You buy second hand. You sew your own clothes. You eat leftovers for days on end. You buy everything on clearance. You don’t buy name brands. You don’t fall prey to “fads” or the latest trends. You make gifts for others instead of buying. You put everything in savings.
When I left home at 15. Do you know what I did? I went BUCK ASS WILD & BAT SHIT CRAZY on many different levels, but I spent, spent, spent, spent every penny before it could hit my pocket. I bought whatever I wanted. I was now in charge of my own finances. I bought expensive clothes. I bought presents for everyone. I did not conserve my money at all.
I have tried to find a balance when teaching my kids how to budget, how to save, how to set goals to get what they want and to NOT expect ME to just shell out cash or fix their problems. I teach them that it’s okay to want “popular/fad” items. I teach them to understand that if they do not want to spend THEIR own money on an unnecessary item, they should not expect to do back flips at the thought of spending my own money on something that does is not a necessity for our home or important to me. So instead of just saying NO, we come up with a plan/solution as family and then when we all have a role that will help fulfill this. Then when the time comes and we have the funds, we evaluate if it’s still important. (There have been times that I offer to pay 1/2 of the cost or have them take on extra chores at the house that I offer to pay them for.) As a parent, this thought process is important for my kids to learn in this NOW, NOW, NOW/instant gratification era and so hopefully they will learn to always find a way to get what they desire on their own and always put some thought into their decisions. NO shortcuts.
If it is not something I give them the go ahead on. I tell them that they can buy it, but it will need to be purchased from their own stash. It’s so funny how quickly their “need” diminishes as soon as they hear that Mom is not picking up the tab. It is funny. My kids go with the motto of “Hey it never hurts to ask!” when wanting some ridiculously expensive non-essential item. After all, they do have a 50% chance of getting the answer they want. I quickly assess the item (purpose, price, features, necessity). I wonder how many parents try this method. Some feel guilty saying no and end up being “Yes parents!”, going to whatever lengths to get whatever their kid wants NOW because they want them to have everything they didn’t growing up. ! I think some would be really surprised at how their kids don’t need the item so bad after all, if they tried my approach.
So many others are like me and weren’t taught what I am teaching my kids. They were not taught to find a way to get what they want. Instead of taking time to come up with a way to make it happen and being patient about the length of time it will take to save up for it. They either just give up on the idea and move on to something that is easier to attain and can be achieved RIGHT NOW or they do what most people seem to do: CHARGE IT!
Now that I understand this, I want to help teach others who want a different life and way of thinking than what was drilled into their head as a child. It is okay to want something that is unnecessary. It’s all about TIMING and working to get it. That’s what makes all of your hard work worth it and makes life enjoyable. I want others to not struggle or have to worry everyday about finances or their debt. Because this I have found is such a huge cause of concern for 98% of the population? Did you know that 98% will be dead or flat broke, depending on government assistance or their family before they are 65? Scary, huh?
#8 You will notice that posts of the same caliber are often expressed with appreciation for your help, your suggestions. These posts though are NOT done to see how many likes or thank you’s can be collected. There are a ton of people who just silently watch, but never comment or acknowledge that they even saw what you shared. But WHO CARES! Remember we are so out of high school. The popularity contest for me, should’ve ended when I graduated High School, but I allowed it to play in my head until just recently (in the past year & I still have it try to restart all over, right where I left off! I stopped comparing myself to those that I compared myself to in High School. Who even knows where they are now. I am the only one who remembers that I didn’t play sports or win any trophies. What counts is RIGHT now. Because if this was my last day here on Earth, I can say with firm conviction that I gave my all, was true to myself and know that the memory others would have to say about me and the description of my character would be something I’d be proud of and way more important than any story of some past school victory or title or trophy I was awarded). As time elapses and you continuously prove that you are what you say you are & your actions back up your words. You will notice that you are the first person that to come to mind when they need reliable, honest, unbiased, advice with no strings attached. Your opinion will become important to them. This is how you cultivate new friendships. They will start telling their friends about you over dinner or drinks or at a family Christmas. They aren’t even realizing they just recommended because they are simply just telling a story about someone they know. Word of mouth is the most powerful way to market yourself and it is the quickest way to spread what type of character you are. So remember, how you treat someone will be passed on to others. People believe others words more than they do proof in writing. When the advice you gave them pans out or gets them to see a point that no one else has ever taken the time to teach them or finally they feel like they have a map with all of the directions on how to get something they had had written off as a buried treasure – You NOW have become a very important person to them. This is how you build a trusting relationship and add value to their life. This has nothing to do with sales, customers, success club points, or commissions. This is simply learning something and then not keeping it to yourself, but sharing it with others! You will create your own brand. Your opinion will be sought after. You will become their confidant. You will become someone they respect. You will become an advisor, a confidant, a friend. When you help others get what you want. You will achieve everything you’ve dreamed of. It does NOT happen the other way around. You DO NOT get what YOU want putting yourself first and then decide to pay it forward.
“I went in to Hibbet Sports on Friday evening looking for a new pair of kicks because mine have seen a lot miles since I bought them in early June. And honestly they weren’t the right type for what I am doing. I didn’t just do what I usually do and go online and pick out what’s on sale or pick what looked the cutest. I asked what the best training shoe was and described what I was doing (P90X3). She showed me my options and to be honest I told her that I thought they were ugly and I wasn’t fond of the colors (I love neutral plain colors). I told her never mind, then I thought “NO! The last thing I want is my feet hurting during the workout tomorrow at Houston’s 1st Quarter Super Saturday”. I asked her how much they cost. She said $65, which is half of what my shoes normal cost. I automatically assumed they were crap. But I told her to bring me out a pair in 7.5. I took them out of the box. I bent them back and forth to see how freely they moved and twisted. I tried them on. I walked in them. I jumped up & down and back in forth in them. I pushed my foot forward hard on the ground to see how they felt on my toes. I jumped some more (next thing I know, Rebel is taking his rubber boots off and jumping next to me). My feet said buy them. My mind said “You deserve this. Buy yourself a birthday present. Use your 2/5 Star bonus you just got this morning. Don’t feel guilty! Who cares if they are “ugly”, you’re not supposed to look cute during your workout. Why do you care, since you workout in the privacy of your own home!” So before I could think about it anymore, I said SOLD. Rebel was excited, because he’d just told me, “I want to go home now and see my Daddy!!”
So my recommendation goes to something new that I’ve never tried – which is scary to me still in some ways. I think we are all a creature of habit to some extent. It’s safe and predictable. Not a lot of risk. Try out Nike Flex trainers. Even Danielle FitandFunky gave me a thumbs up on this purchase!
They’re only $65 – chances are you all already spent that amount over the weekend.
They’re light. Flexible. Breathable. Perfect for HIIT and PLYO workouts.
FYI: If you are wearing running shoes during your workout – TOSS THEM! Or wear them for what they were designed for: RUNNING.
These support side to side motion. Running shoes support forward motion.
These stood the test of P90X3’s Warrior workout yesterday. No pain. No sore feet today.
Make your workout enjoyable.
Make your feet happy.
Make your journey as painless as possible.
You’re worth the investment. You’ll get more use, memorable mileage & satisfaction on your journey wearing these on your feet than with that expensive designer purse, sunglasses or jeans that you’ve been wanting to blow a fortune on.
Invest in yourself.
Invest in your goals.
Invest in your future self.
Save that expensive splurge item dangle in front of you as a reward for when you reach your goal. It provides incentive & motivation! Post a picture of your REWARD somewhere you look at daily to serve as a constant reminder (mirror in bathroom, fridge door or phone screensaver)
That way, when you do reach your goal, you will feel proud being the owner of that expensive item because you’ll know you earned it. It’ll symbolize as your trophy for winning at the game of life: overcoming the word can’t & achieving what you thought was impossible & what others said you couldn’t do.
It’ll provide more satisfaction at the time than if you were to go NOW and get as an impulsive instant gratification purchase to make you feel better when you’re feeling discouraged, that you know you will later on feel guilty for spending your hard earned cash on.
Yesterday when I put these on and my hit the floor I felt NO REGRETS!! All I could think about was – IT’S GO TIME. Let’s see how high you can jump!
A day later, I no longer think they’re ugly.
Moral of the story: Take a few minutes to examine your purchases for quality and determine if it will provide long term value. Don’t let price be your determining factor of whether you should purchase something. Just because it’s “cheap”, or “or fits your budget” or is “on sale” does NOT mean you need it or that it’s something that is invaluable to you or fits the needs you have. If it’s out of your reach NOW financially. Don’t give up and assume it’s unattainable. Set up a savings jar. Set a goal of weekly monetary amounts to deposit and calculate the date to have it all collected. Sell unused items that were last years impulse buys that are just laying around. Make a commitment to be honest with yourself and if you catch yourself going to spend your cash on a frivolous item, instead put that money you were about to spend in that jar. Before you know it, you will have met your goal. While your gathering funds, keep your eyes open for upcoming sales on this item. You never know, you may find it cheaper and then can save the excess for something else in the future that you may “need” or to go towards your REWARD.
Who knew a story about a shoe could turn into all of this!
^ That is a testimony that I am who I say I am. That what I share does indeed carry weight. People value and trust my opinion. This is important, because nowadays, a lot of people promise things, claim to be someone that they really are not. People have to trust you in order to believe in you and what you do and recommend.
Sure it was just shoes to some, but to me it was a lot more. It provided a testimony of my mission in life: to help educate others, bring value in their life, and strengthen and build new and existing friendships!
I know this it was long, so if you are reading this. Thanks for taking your time to read this.
If there is anything you’d like to add to share with me or others as a suggestion, please let me know!
I hope this helps you in some way personally or in this business.
I am sure you can correlate the key components of this lesson to many aspects of your life and to help you reach others and help them find a solution and get past that wall.